{"id":510,"date":"2010-02-17T15:05:35","date_gmt":"2010-02-17T19:05:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www3.arts.umich.edu\/ink\/?p=510"},"modified":"2010-02-17T19:21:31","modified_gmt":"2010-02-17T23:21:31","slug":"dont-be-a-tomboy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/artsatmichigan.umich.edu\/ink\/2010\/02\/17\/dont-be-a-tomboy\/","title":{"rendered":"Don’t Be a Tomboy"},"content":{"rendered":"

There are many, vastly different opinions of what a person should be. How a respectable student should behave. What a responsible man must do. This recent writing exercise seemed fitting in lieu of my recent, emergency appendectomy, as well as, for fellow Lost<\/i> fans, John Locke’s “Don’t tell me what I can’t do!”<\/p>\n

Don’t be A Tomboy\u00c2\u00a0<\/p>\n

Or do anything daring at all\u00e2\u20ac\u201dyou\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll just get hurt. After all, you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re prone to it, to getting hurt. What with your condition and all. No, nothing even remotely daring. So before you do anything, and I mean anything: picture me. Would I approve?\"\" If you have even the slightest doubt, don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t do it. Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think twice. The answer is firm. The answer is \u00e2\u20ac\u0153No.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d No climbing of trees. No climbing of mountains. No shoes without proper arches (and they must always be clean). Take better care of your shoes. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even know why I buy them for you. They\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re always ruined. Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t walk in the rain, stop walking in the rain. Your shoes will ruin and you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re really better off staying indoors, anyway. If you walk in the rain you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re likely to catch a cold. Or pneumonia. And don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re going dancing in those shoes, either. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t want you out dancing and drinking. You\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll get too tired; you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll stay up too late. Your friends will forget about you and leave you behind. And worst of all\u00e2\u20ac\u201dyour shoes, they\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll scuff. A proper lady keeps her shoes clean. Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t listen to music loudly. Eat your food slowly. Order a salad. At home, clear the table. Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t tell your boyfriend, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I love you.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I know you don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t. When you break up, wait a while before finding another boyfriend. Not long enough and you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re trash. Too long, you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re a lesbian. Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t tell me you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re a lesbian. Your reputation is only as clean as your shoes. You have too many male friends, which makes me suspect you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re a lesbian. You spend too much time with them. You sweat with them. You\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re going to get hurt if you carry on like this, with your hiking, your camping. You can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t live out of a backpack. You can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t just gallivant about the wilderness. You can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t fight the elements. Listen: You\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re going to get very hurt, or maybe you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re going to die. The mosquitoes are terrible out there. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll bet you contract West Nile. Your asthma\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s getting worse, too. And for God\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s sake: remember your blood condition. I know you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re not drinking enough water. I know you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re picking your scabs. That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s why you have so many scars\u00e2\u20ac\u201ddon\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t you listen to your dermatologist at all? If you weren\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t gallivanting about the wilderness all summer, wearing your hair short in that bandana like the lesbian you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re becoming, you wouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have these hideous scars. Or this sunburn. Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t you wear sunscreen? And how many times do I have to tell you to reapply it? You reapply sunscreen every hour. That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s every single hour, reapplying your sunscreen. That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s the appropriate amount. But you, you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re red. Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t you know that this family has a history of skin cancer? And would you please just stop and think a minute, about your condition? Jesus Christ, your condition! Well, once you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve gotten another boyfriend I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll continue questioning your sexuality on a semi regular basis, but you better not be having sexual intercourse. Slow down. Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t blow all of your money on train fare. And especially not on airfare. There\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a lot of risk involved with air travel. Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t go where I can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t follow. Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t walk so fast in those shoes. They\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll scuff.<\/p>\n

Peace,
\nMolly<\/p>\n

Molly Ann Blakowski majors in English and jumps in puddles.<\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There are many, vastly different opinions of what a person should be. How a respectable student should behave. What a responsible man must do. This recent writing exercise seemed fitting in lieu of my recent, emergency appendectomy, as well as, for fellow Lost fans, John Locke’s “Don’t tell me what I can’t do!” Don’t be […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/artsatmichigan.umich.edu\/ink\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/510"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/artsatmichigan.umich.edu\/ink\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/artsatmichigan.umich.edu\/ink\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/artsatmichigan.umich.edu\/ink\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/6"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/artsatmichigan.umich.edu\/ink\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=510"}],"version-history":[{"count":15,"href":"https:\/\/artsatmichigan.umich.edu\/ink\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/510\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":525,"href":"https:\/\/artsatmichigan.umich.edu\/ink\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/510\/revisions\/525"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/artsatmichigan.umich.edu\/ink\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=510"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/artsatmichigan.umich.edu\/ink\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=510"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/artsatmichigan.umich.edu\/ink\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=510"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}