Learning How to Breathe

We are all born knowing how to breathe. It’s simple and the moment life begins our nervous system takes over and begins to tell us “inhale, exhale” so quietly that we forget we were ever listening. Even in the moments that take our breathe away we are reminded “inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale”. After a sudden grab of your shoulder or a noise in the darkness “inhale, exhale, inhale”. So how is it that something so natural and so practiced can be so hard?

A singer is only as good as their last breath and lately, the breaths that I have been taking have been shallows gasps desperate for life instead of expansive, “let it all go” breaths that feel like the obvious eventuality, sucking in fresh air without any effort at all. Like most areas of my life, I’m overthinking it. Worried I am not doing enough, I work harder and harder to get a good breath, a counterproductive effort resulting in the tighten up of each and every muscles in my body and pushing through the air rather than allowing it to flow through me.

So why is it so hard? Why can I not simply do less and allow my body to do what it has done for the past 22 years and simply breathe?

Part of it must be mental. The subconscious belief that art is pain, suffering and determination against all odds. That for true artistry to exist one must be on the brink of emotional and physical distress. The misguided belief that Alexandria, just as she is with no frills or fancy footwork, is good enough and strong enough in her technique to simply breathe, engage and sing. The rest then must be a learned habit developed over time. Ingrained in me during hours in the practice room and established as a new normal during performance.

If I am to survive as a singer, as an artist and a human being I must learn to breathe properly. To let it all go so that I can begin anew and to not push when I get to the end, but trust that my technique will support me, is terrifying in all regards but necessary if I wish to move forward. After all, how hard could it be? If I could do it when I was just a few days old why not now?