Evolving Emotions: Joy-Poetry

Joy is a summer night.

Mosquitoes buzzing in the air and

The laughter of long-time friends

After your marshmallow erupts ablaze from

A fire that conveys ash, decorating the air like confetti

 

Joy is a sunrise.

In your grandmother’s home

Sitting on the hardwood

As a cat lay on the windowsill

Watching the colors blend in a symphony

 

Joy is a first love.

Butterflies swish inside

At the sight of that face

That makes your knees buckle

And a smile sparking fireworks to nip at your fingertips

 

Joy is in everything

If one squints hard enough

At dusty photographs

At events unfolding with torn edges

And at hands to hold, things to see, and moments yet to be

Evolving Emotions: Joy-Photography

Faking smiles is neither pleasant nor effective. Find trustworthy people to confide your demons in. You may feel a little lighter. You may even take down that mask one day.
This was taken another life ago but I can still recall the joy I felt. This feeling is as saturated and wonderful as ever.

 

Fairy lights were the best purchase I made for my dorm room. They light up my life! (Literally lol.)

Joy is expressed in so many forms and through so many experiences, objects, and memories. Hold onto that which is real and beautiful.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1zYeJuztwfo3q2dQwU-gnyvkPDvDHgHkHOcOoOdsm1rM/edit?usp=sharing

Evolving Emotions: Joy-Poetry

Six Twenty-Five

 

Hospital chatter comprised of hushed whispers

A cacophony of voices

And low sighs

 

Six twenty-two

 

A cart’s wheels squeaking through the halls

Maddening in its movement

Never ceasing

 

Six twenty-three

 

Machines whirring on the hour

The PA system’s jargon tumbles into the void

The clock ticks methodically

 

Six twenty-four

 

A girl watches

She smiles where shy lay

Extended by

Wires and cords

An IV drains her

 

But the creases beneath her eyes

The folded lines circling her mouth

Refuse to quit

She smiles triumphantly

Whether it is old wisdom written in her genes

Or young innocence that drives her face

 

Is unimportant

She smiles despite it all

 

Her body decays

With fatigue that makes the bones melt

Pain that drives pleading

She smiles

 

It’s unnatural

And odd

A peculiar display

In such a place

The human will

Falls apart

And yet finds contentment

 

Her pale eyes gaze at blank white walls

Her ears absorb the speech in the halls

 

She looks inward

To starry sky camping trips

And family movie nights

To swimming pool laps with rounds of Marco Pollo

The times when things were beautiful

 

Her parents will be here soon

Her brother and sister too

 

She smiles at the thought of six twenty-five

Almost to the parking lot

And through the revolving doors

 

They will be here

Beside her

To reminisce and laugh

About what once was

And could still be

 

Despite it all,

She smiles

Bright and bold

Because things have been beautiful

And will again

At six twenty-five

 

 

Evolving Emotions: Joy

Embrace all flaws, aspirations, past triumphs and failures, and everything in between because you deserve happiness and contentment within yourself.
Happiness means building a life out of purpose and community. Those things take time! Give yourself some grace as you traverse this life.

 

There’s a lot to love about living, so stick around! Maybe stop and smell some flowers to pass the time. 🙂

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1zYeJuztwfo3q2dQwU-gnyvkPDvDHgHkHOcOoOdsm1rM/edit?usp=sharing

WOAH IM SO EXCITED I CANT BREATHE, WHAT HELLO WHERE AM I

I’m at the point in my life/semester/being where I’m overwhelmed by living–it’s just so damn exciting. I wake up and get to learn, get to work, get to work out, get to read, get to love, get to eat, get to dance (my knee is more or less healed), I get to be.

I get to listen to 2ne1’s new album and RuPaul’s new album. AKA life is good.

2NE1_CRUSH          rupaul-born-naked-400x400

I find myself so excited, or so overwhelmed by emotion, or so confused, that I cannot breath. Akin to panic/anxiety attacks, this type of attack is, what I’ve learned, what it means for me (in this moment) to be alive. It’s like an eternal trill on pick-your-instrument. So exciting, so fast, so pretty, so alarming.

I finished (one of) my favorite book(s) yesterday. I got to jog two days in a row. I frolicked in the sun. I made an amazing meal. I met a friend’s girlfriend. I spent much needed time with a semi-significant other. And, of course, bad things happened, but it’s in this moment that I just need to celebrate the good stuff.

Tomorrow (after 4:30) marks the first inhalation of Spring Break and I’ll be holding my breath until it ends.

It’s like when you step into UMMA, wander upstairs, and see Monet *literally* just peeking at you. It’s like wandering into a club to see your friend DJ-ing. It’s like walking down the street and having someone across the intersection belting Beyonce. It’s like almost slipping on ice and then catching yourself in a bush. Pretty much the best thing ever.

Amazing-Smiling-Singer-Beyonce-Knowles

So even if I’m utterly bored by still being in undergrad. Even if it surprised snowed at me after a Bio exam (#lol). Even if everyone is really a mess. Even if I will have never gone anywhere for Spring Break EVER.

I still have this one panicked breath. And that, really, is all I need.