I sat down for dinner at 7:22
The same time I sat down for breakfast 12 hours earlier
Who knew I would know the taste of milk just before expiration
Hearing the sounds of people running downstairs and jiggling keys
Flinching with every moment that it comes closer
To the time my door is opened
The internet serves as a record of my friends
Dwindling with each year
When you realize you’re too warm
And too lazy to take off your jacket
It’s the feeling of someone walking too close
There are the conversations you overhear
Not unwelcome, but uncomfortable
You wonder if you should slow your pace
but no matter what you’re both in stride
When I finally have the chance to breathe
I can’t stop thinking about
The way you see me
Inverting previous admonitions
From condescension to care
I wonder if I too am inverted
If the miles between us
Cloud your words
Making fickle mist with every breath
Painted like a desert
Wrapping on the edges
Yelling to you
As you turn away
You got tired of hearing me
You used to reach inside
And hold me
And now you don’t even watch
You listen to my ramblings with slight acknowledgments
And when the slightest words catch your attention
You turn away
Lessening my pace
So I can see you in front of me
Changing my stride
So that you can walk past me
Checking my words so that you can respect me
I want you to notice me
Hear me
See me
But I become invisible
To stay safe
Your limbs are tendrils
Flailing in protest offbeat
to the beat of hearts
Working
to understand
your speech.
Seek the neverending sending of messages that
teach upstanding misunderstanding of
Your hair and why it crinkles
So early after water stipples hit
Freshly
Burned
Skin
Cells that work against it
Turn you thick to sense it
Coming
Before
The wind
Your reaction
Almost human
Flesh
always brazen to the thought of the world we’re in.
