If you could write me
You’d write wrong
Right before you
Say something I’ve said
How could you
Could you know-how
You could wait
Wait till you can
But then
You’d be too early
Early morning
I see you sleeping
Slowly breathing
A smile slipped
Across your face
But who could talk
While tangled
A scoff
A scorn
A sigh
A scour
A sorry
A silence
A sound
A song
A show
A shimmer
A success
I
Question her lack of
Reciprocation. I made a
Declaration about my
Intentions and yet her dull
Reaction leaves me in my
Emotions. Is further
Action necessary? Or should I stir in my
Ambitions and keep
Caution close to the chest? For the
Duration that I remain
Fixation is all I know.
Rumination about what could have been if I had
Conviction in my speech. What could have been of this
Situation if I had told her? My only
Communication was a pitiful
“I…”.
A strange place
The table isn’t quite situated
On the once whole tiling
Proper is the word
The smell that once greeted me
Feels out of place
Inside my lungs, it is a stranger
What has become of
The inhabitants
Which I thought I knew?
Nothing could’ve prepared
My mind, my body
For this upheaval
Guttural
Inconceivable
Quaking
In the now fractured life
I stubbornly live
My arms crave a rope
My feet, solid ground
Unsatisfied is the word
This bizarre, unsatisfying abode
Which I once called home
Is now alien
With a peculiar look
And paint laced with difference
Will things return
To the gaps in my head?
Will I find peace
And solace in the disruption?
Nothing will take its original form
The form has shifted
The feeling has shifted
My perception has crossed
Into a foreign land
Unbeknownst to me
This is only the beginning
I saw the stars this morning
The sun had not yet climbed the shingled roofs
Nor surmounted the plumes of smoke
Produced by the slumbering city
Each a fleck of twinkling perfection
My eyes gleamed alongside them
In a vast gift
A sight to behold
These gems of the sky are deceptive
They hide their torment
The destruction that defines their state
They are dead and dying.
That which is beautiful
Is temporary
Breathe in the expanse
The comforting peace
This quiet morning
For it is not forever
Although we wish it to be
There will be a last
Air leaves the lungs
Carrying the soul in its glow
These precious stars shine
Despite their fate
Despite their circumstance
Do not grieve
Let the feeling linger
Let the light bathe you
Do not taint it with sadness
For it happened
It was wonderful
I saw the stars this morning
And it was wonderful.
I feel your presence beside me
On the frigid, unforgiving Earth
On the lonely wooden park bench
On the gentle bed we shared
I hear your voice
In the corridor you passed
In the kitchen you cherished
In the doorway to our home
I smell you in all that is beautiful
A hint of lavender in someone’s hair
A box of oranges sold at the market
A loaf of bread I find at the bakery
I surmise that I’ve see you
Maybe?
Maybe not.
Perhaps it is madness
It’s hard to discern
The wishes and whims
The truth and sacred lies
Perhaps, I witness what I was too blind to see yesterday
No matter
Alas,
We are apart
But soon
We will feel each other’s warmth
In a plane unlike this one
My joy
My love
My apparition forevermore
