aSoSS 52 | Gradient

Do you know anyone in high school right now?

Yeah, my sister.

Is she a tweaker or is she normal? My brother’s normal.

Science Learning Center, 5:00PM, 2/19/2025

imagination is a gradient of experience charted against naïveté. it is the tightrope between consciousness and fear, where a knife is seen as shiny instead of sharp. to be able to listen to a house and hear the laughter through its membrane. to be able to look at a cloud and see a cloud and not a butterfly, or a hibiscus, or a tragedy. a contraction–a contradiction–in a mirror we crystallize infinity and sell it back to ourselves. in this crystal, a tombstone: you are a name, and then a last name, and no more.


I’ll be doing a lot of things this weekend, and by a lot of things, I mean doing nothing.

Chem Building, 10:30PM, 3/23/2025

there is a summer hidden behind the curtain of a weeknight, an eternity nested within itself. every day is a sacrifice and every sacrifice demands a savior. the sky opens like a slit throat, warm and gushing with the promise of a sunset, a scar that will wrinkle in the sun. in the shadow of the moon–in the interval between now and never–you will disappear into the black and i will not even have the thought of your face for comfort. oh, martyr! on that summer weeknight you became a hero to the world and the memory of a hero to me.


With this message, do you think you are blessing him or do you think you are cursing him?

Palmer Commons, 4:00PM, 4/9/2025

and then suddenly, a tilt of the head and the heart is gasping for air. each sentence a slipknot: a mouthful, or a minefield? a rose, freshly cut, stem against cheek, dying between breaths–who is the one dying? how easily the words spilled from my fingers and onto the page. the ink bleeds transparencies, truths unveiled and secrets deciphered. your glance dissolves muscle and unzips bone, a medusa in media res, where serpents shatter glass with their tongues and turn beads of sweat into reams of stone.

black girl diaries (2): line leader

i remember when i was nothing but Hope

i remember when i thought that my Hope was enough
to save the world.
when i felt that everything was to be done right.
when i had the answer to absolutely everything
and nothing could change it.

in elementary school i was always
running to be the line leader,
to tell my peers to buckle up
and wait their turns
and stand up straight
and quiet down
and then it’d all be fixed.

and i remember wanting to be president.
to solve world hunger and bring world peace,
to bring a better life.
the eyes of a child and the eyes of an idealist
are one in the same, and
both are so very needed.

my eyes grow dimmer,
my prescription weaker,
and i have cataracts on my soul, my spirit,
and i can barely see the light anymore.

the Hope, it persists nonetheless
like a echo.
it has lasted far longer than i ever thought it would.
i can even hear it now.

but it is dying, slowly and steadily, no matter how many times i resucitate it.

i now see those who i love and care for
who i worry and fear for
being told by others who will never care to know my loved ones
to buckle up
and wait their turns
and stand up straight
and quiet down

to listen up
and quickly move
and shut their mouths
and stay alert
and don’t speak up
and don’t resist
and don’t you dare.

and to refuse would be risking everything.
i fear for those risking everything.
i fear for them, and for those who will be told they’re risking everything
no matter what they do.

when do you cry for help?
when it is too late? when you’re there just in time?

where is our line leader. does such a person, such an entity, even exist.

will it ever.

Capturing Campus: Birthday Card

Birthday Card

It was your birthday like every year

colored pencils to paper 

(what knives are to skin)

you told me green was your favorite color

—you didn’t have one

I know that now

but I didn’t know that then

so I tore up the backyard

ripped leaves from maple trees

scooped moss in mighty handfuls 

fistfuls, pocketfuls

to give to you

you lied because colors don’t shine

for old shuttered eyes

closer to glaucoma than clarity 

bleeding monochrome 

the dull and dim

the world without harpsichord tones

on rolling hills born into richness

of flavor

of color worth witnessing

on the page and in your palms

you are running out of birthdays

aSoSS 51 | Stained

Over Christmas I started making it for him, my dad has a workshop, so I made him a wooden cooking spoon!

RoosRoast, 10:00AM, 3/29/2025

a sleight of your hand and the coffee has splashed across the white: the countertop a constellation of heartbeats, the marble annotated with stars. a sleight of your hand, this falling. your soul is stitched into tragedy and still i pulled the thread, hanging on for dear life, unraveling us both. the fourth law of physics: inertia is the toil and ecstasy is the reward. my autobiography will spill your name all over the margins, each footnote an explosion of springtime. do you remember the flowers? i wish you would.


I am learning how to make a crème brulee!

Do you have a torch?

I have a very big torch.

West Medical Center, 4:00PM, 2/25/2025

the fire burns bright blue, a blue that cannot be caged or stoked or photographed. the kind of blue that can be only described by a look–sapphire and cerulean and the teal from a thick stack of glass–the kind of look you never forget. i wear your lenses and they distort my vision: they turn you into stars, a bright pulse of glowing light. no one has ever looked at me this way. did you ever ask me what i wanted to tell you? a scar in my retina, long after the sun sets, long after i get my answer. there is blood and there is sky and there is nothing in between. a face so white, you would have thought i saw a ghost–


It reminds me of your mom, because back in high school she used to do it and then she would flip her hair back and I thought it was the coolest thing ever!

Ann Arbor City Club, 10:00AM, 3/22/2025

we are always evolving, though not necessarily in the forward direction. i met a man who claimed he could change the past–isn’t that funny? we can all change the past, if we choose to remember it differently. our neurons are built on a foundation of quicksand, always moving, always drowning; quiet your mind and they lose their tension, sinking, never to resurface. flushed away, a bitter flavor seeping out of filter paper. diffusion, effluence, transition state. a recipe for a coffee stain on a countertop: a sprinkle of indifference and a dash of luck.

Capturing Campus: Be There

Be There

Who would save you from yourself

When caution signs turn invitation

Who would dampen the fire

At breakfast, lunch, and dinner

Who would force the world to turn

When the door is wedged

And you’re worried about tomorrow

Who would hold you in your head

And carry you in your waking

Who would love you when it’s hard

And calm you when it’s not

Who would be there 

When the drugs wear off

Living gets heavy

I won’t be there

I’m sorry