Evolving Emotions: Fear-Poetry

Empty Coat Pockets

 

An old grandfather clock

The pendulum sways

The hands tick and click

Stealing the days away

 

Too few minutes

In a day

 

Too few days

In a week

 

Too few weeks

In a month

 

Too few months

In a year

 

Too few years

In a decade

 

Too few decades

In a century

 

So little time

To do all and everything

Staring at the clock

But you can’t capture the hands

In that coat pocket

 

Too long

Too short

Too fast

Too slow

 

How long has it been?

Where did the times go?

Has it really been that long?

I remember it like it was yesterday.

The timing feels so wrong.

 

Graying and sagging by the second

Death’s deadline closes in

Quietly

 

At your bedside

Realizing the minutes and days

Have slipped away

 

All the memories you never made

All of the times you didn’t stay

All of the words you never prayed

 

And you couldn’t take the clock’s hands

In your coat pockets

Hold them close and dear

 

So instead

In your bed

You lay in fear

As the grandfather clock’s chime

Rings near

To claim your final breath.

 

Evolving Emotions: Joy-Poetry

Joy is a summer night.

Mosquitoes buzzing in the air and

The laughter of long-time friends

After your marshmallow erupts ablaze from

A fire that conveys ash, decorating the air like confetti

 

Joy is a sunrise.

In your grandmother’s home

Sitting on the hardwood

As a cat lay on the windowsill

Watching the colors blend in a symphony

 

Joy is a first love.

Butterflies swish inside

At the sight of that face

That makes your knees buckle

And a smile sparking fireworks to nip at your fingertips

 

Joy is in everything

If one squints hard enough

At dusty photographs

At events unfolding with torn edges

And at hands to hold, things to see, and moments yet to be

Evolving Emotions: Joy-Poetry

Six Twenty-Five

 

Hospital chatter comprised of hushed whispers

A cacophony of voices

And low sighs

 

Six twenty-two

 

A cart’s wheels squeaking through the halls

Maddening in its movement

Never ceasing

 

Six twenty-three

 

Machines whirring on the hour

The PA system’s jargon tumbles into the void

The clock ticks methodically

 

Six twenty-four

 

A girl watches

She smiles where shy lay

Extended by

Wires and cords

An IV drains her

 

But the creases beneath her eyes

The folded lines circling her mouth

Refuse to quit

She smiles triumphantly

Whether it is old wisdom written in her genes

Or young innocence that drives her face

 

Is unimportant

She smiles despite it all

 

Her body decays

With fatigue that makes the bones melt

Pain that drives pleading

She smiles

 

It’s unnatural

And odd

A peculiar display

In such a place

The human will

Falls apart

And yet finds contentment

 

Her pale eyes gaze at blank white walls

Her ears absorb the speech in the halls

 

She looks inward

To starry sky camping trips

And family movie nights

To swimming pool laps with rounds of Marco Pollo

The times when things were beautiful

 

Her parents will be here soon

Her brother and sister too

 

She smiles at the thought of six twenty-five

Almost to the parking lot

And through the revolving doors

 

They will be here

Beside her

To reminisce and laugh

About what once was

And could still be

 

Despite it all,

She smiles

Bright and bold

Because things have been beautiful

And will again

At six twenty-five

 

 

Evolving Emotions: Goodbye

So quickly it began

With nervous laughter

Sweaty palms

Hearts racing wildly

The unknown ahead

 

So slowly it passed

Difficult days

Difficult nights

Tears and sweat and pain

Awaiting the day

 

Of the end

The last day of the start

Of more difficult days

Difficult nights ahead

But some good ones too

 

Much bitter sweetness lingers

In every goodbye

With a wave

Say goodbye to

All of the lessons learned

People met

 

And things yet to become

 

We must cherish all endings

However bitter

Or deliciously sweet

For they are final, of course

And now,

Onto something new

 

Evolving Emotions: Moderation

*Trigger Warning*

This poem contains eating disorder subject matter.

 

In the realm of hypocrisy

Everything in moderation

The chant that leads to an obsession

An obsession that cannot be moderated

Counting the calories

Saying no

Saying yes becomes a rarity

And even then

Wishing you hadn’t

That number on the scale

Satisfying but wanting

Wanting perfection

That moderation of flesh

Of fat

Of life

Wanting the shock

The surprise

The congratulatory remarks

They didn’t know the damage done

Seasons pass

A new obsession

One of eating feelings

Crying frustration

Counting calories

Unable to stop the pain

You stuff it down your throat

Only for it to come back up

A mess of “moderation”

Of obsession beyond balance

Beyond sense

Polar sides

Neither just right

Always looking

Striving

For the approval

For the stability

Of those words

Everything in moderation”

 

Evolving Emotions: Spring

Crunch and fragility

Dull brown and lifeless

A flower

Killed by cold

A horrendous annual crime

 

But upon a newfound strength

By the Earth’s nurturing scape

A blooming begins

 

Inaction and then

Elation at a new

Motion in the ground

Abolition of the lifelessness of yesterday

Captivation of colors. The

Transformation beneath. A

Foundation of weaving threads. An

Interconnection of the greatest

Creation brought along by the spring

Resurrection