S2 Scribble #10: Mother

“Go, go, go, go, now, out of the nest it’s time…”

In less than a week, I leave for my semester in Berlin, Germany. Studying abroad in Berlin is something I’ve dreamed about for years (I even cried tears of joy when I got my acceptance letter), but now, as my departure date gets closer and closer, I can’t help but wonder how I’m actually going to be able to do this.

“Here, here, now, don’t cry, you raised your hand for the assignment…”

Intellectually, I know that I will be able to “do this.” I know that I’ll have a life changing experience and broaden my perspective of the world, and I know that I will forever appreciate taking advantage of this opportunity to study abroad. It’s like how I felt when I first arrived at Michigan, but instead of an eight hour drive, it’s two flights that take a bit more time than that. Instead of a roommate, I’ll be living with a host family. Instead of walking through campus, I’ll be navigating public transportation to get to my classes. The possibilities and opportunities will be endless, but the closer my flight comes, the more I seem to be focused on the stressful unknowns as opposed to the exciting ones.

“First my left foot, then my right behind the other…”

But, like my first semester at Michigan, once I am there, finding my way will be natural – I won’t have a choice. I have already made a bucket list of some of the things I want to do while abroad, and I’m sure plenty more things will be added. I am looking forward to meeting my host family, professors, classmates, and new friends. I’m thrilled to be able to walk the same streets that some of my favorite artists walked on 40 years prior and explore a city I’ve wanted to visit for years. As anxious as I may be at this moment, I believe that will soon subside once I arrive in Berlin. For all the anxiety I may feel right now, I know deep down that for every piece of me that is anxious, I am several times more hopeful and excited for my semester abroad.

“Mother the car is here, somebody leave the light on… just in case I like the dancing,”

I’ll be pausing my Song Scribbles blogs while abroad, but if you’d like to continue supporting my writing (and keep up with my adventures in Berlin), feel free to check out my new blog: https://www.iesabroad.org/correspondents/sydney-braun. I look forward to creating more Song Scribbles blogs in the future, but for now, Auf Wiedersehen!

“I can remember where I come from.”

Listen to Mother by Tori Amos here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2uaA23WOytc

Fable Friday: Celtic Sorceress Cont.

Hi everyone! As I alluded to last week, I thought I would share my process on a Celtic Sorceress design. I’m not entirely happy with it yet, I think I may add some extra gold details to the cape/cloak design. Also, I wanted her color scheme to be red, gold and green, since those are colors often associated with the Celtics and their clothing, but I didn’t want her to look to much like Christmas. I also gave her a cute fire lizard friend! I’m already thinking about next week being inspired by Japanese Mythology and creating a unique kimono design.

 

The Jukebox: New Drugs

Lyrics from “New Drugs” by Raveena. Raveena is one of my all time favorite artists. Her music is comforting both musically and lyrically, making it a great de-stresser. Her lyrics in “New Drugs” point out the pressure that’s often put on us to be efficient. The idea that we’re only worth something when we’re working can be extremely damaging and hard to unlearn. Taking breaks to take care of yourself is the best way to combat this.

Sagas Among the Arcana: Impulse

The Devil is drawn — addiction, strange experiences

 

“Have you heard of the snake upon the hill?”

Everyone is aware of that snake. One knows its existence as well as they know that the sky is blue. However, today the sky is red, so maybe some do not know of its existence as well. But I do — which is why I am at the hill — which is what I also told the woman. 

“Then why go up it?”

Why? Does one know why the sky is blue? No, it just is — just how Impulse is. Impulse that now leads me up the hill. It doesn’t speak to me, it only grasps my hand firmly. It won’t seem like it will leave me anytime soon. 

Impulse tells me things, not through words, but through actions. It’s telling me now that I have to meet the Devil Snake — I did not know it was called the Devil Snake, but Impulse decides that it is. 

Then, when I reach the cave Impulse also commands that I take it as a sword and slay the serpent, and who am I to refuse Impulse’s command? So it slithers down my arm to my palm where it allows me to hold it by its legs. I go into the cave with Impulse’s strong hold on me. Its strong hold tugs me through the dark cool archway, which immediately consumes us within its darkness. 

I can only see the Devil Snake because it is on fire, making it glow an unearthly amber. It hisses, a pink tongue sticks out. Impulse resolves that I must cut it. I flinch, for once doubting Impulse. What if it eats me? But Impulse never answers. Reason is not in its nature. So blindly I follow Impulse — it is all that I have to drive me. 

I charge and jump up, but the snake is far too long, and Impulse doesn’t give me the strength to reach it.

After all, it is not in Impulse’s nature to give. Impulse serves itself. After me, it will find someone else to follow it.

The serpent swallows me. Today the sky is black.

The Devil from Tarot of the Divine

 

end

Letters by Lydia: Sometimes it Doesn’t Work

Welcome back to Letters by Lydia! Hopefully everyone was able to stay safe and warm in the snow, or maybe even go out and build a snowman 🙂

Today I want to talk about all the times–and trust me, there are many–that lettering ideas and techniques don’t work out.  A lot of times in the art community, especially on social media, we only see the work that people are super proud of: work that’s polished, high quality, creative, unique, and so on. Because of this, it can be really easy to fall into the trap of feeling like your work isn’t good enough, or that everyone else is much more talented. That said, I have noticed lately that people on social media seem to be getting a little more vocal about the importance of the process. Bad art is just as important as good art, because it helps you learn and grow as an artist. If your art was perfect all the time, there would be no room for experimentation, doodling, mistakes, and most importantly, fun!

I’m sure none of this is news to most of you, but I wanted to share an example of some lettering I did today that I couldn’t quite figure out. I wanted to try a new lettering style where it looks like letters someone wrote with their finger in the snow, which ended up being much harder than I anticipated.

After consulting an overwhelming number of google images, my first attempt landed me with this:

When I first did this, I wasn’t in love with, but with some distance I can honestly say this might’ve been my best attempt.  I chalk it up to beginner’s luck, though, because I could not for the life of me produce this kind of style again.  In hindsight, I think the key was only using two colors, because this was the only attempt where I limited my color palette that much.

My next attempt I’m actually super proud of and think looks pretty realistic. The issue? It took forever, so it didn’t feel reasonable to try and do a whole word in this style. My original idea was also to have this as a type of style, not a kind of one-time piece that would be difficult to recreate.  In any case, this is what I ended up with here:

After this, I started trying whole words, and played around with using the colors in different ways, different textures, and different thicknesses.  I don’t dislike any of these, but I don’t think any of them read quite as I wanted them to–they look like pretty snow-themed pieces, but not necessarily like someone was writing in the snow, unless you’re looking at them with that style in mind.

Of course, in this example of things not working out, I still generally liked the end results, they just weren’t what I had in mind originally.  That said, I can’t tell you the number of times I try things that end up looking absolutely terrible, and I can definitely start sharing that stuff too! But I thought it was important to show that there’s also this middle ground where the work you produce is still good, it just doesn’t align with the vision you had, because this also allows for artistic experimentation and learning new styles and techniques.

This is a style I plan to experiment with a bit more and see if it’s something I can refine, but even if it isn’t, I had fun playing around with something new!

I hope you enjoyed reading, and stay safe out there in the snow!

TOLAROIDS: “Table Manners”

If you followed my work last year you know I try to avoid unjustified black & white editing. In the case of this series though we were aiming for a romantic, slightly vintage and polaroid-like look. It was not a serious photoshoot, but turned into a fun portrait of playful femininity which I called “Table Manners.”

 

 

 

 

 

Model & idea: Julia Jaworska

 

Any comments/ideas/questions:

email: akilian@umich.edu

Instagram: akilian.jpg

 

Model: Julia Jaworska (Instagram: @jawor_j)