Musings of a College Student Home for the Holidays

To all of my friends and family, have you ever noticed how the people we are together are so different from the people we are when we’re apart? Life feels so unusual and yet so the same whenever I leave school and go back home, or leave home and go back to school. I know coming back to the people I know and love and care about is great, but sometimes I wonder how I can be a different person at home from the person I am at school, but both people can still be me. It’s not that I’m any less happy at one place or the other; I’m just different. Being at school makes me want to write and read and hang out with friends in trendy coffee shops while we plan our escape to Alaska. Being at home makes me want to paint and explore and lay around in bed with my dog and the small cluster of high school friends who I can still call mine while we plan our escape to Alaska.

Hey, on a side note, does anyone want to go to Alaska? No reason just wondering.

Okay, back to my profound musings on the strange internal and external changes that come about when you change the people you’re with and the location you’re with them. I’ve been thinking about all of these things, and I know I can’t be the only one. Do you ever get lonely surrounded by friends because you realize those aren’t the friends you’re used to being with? It’s not a sad kind of lonely, just an outsider kind of lonely. Sometimes that happens to me after a long break like this. I come back to school and I’m bouncing with joy to see everyone, but it’s just slightly off. I used to think it was just a product of the changing scenery, but now I think it’s a product of the changing scenery and getting older.

Getting older is what people say when they’ve gotten older, which is kind of funny. When we were younger we’d hear about people getting older all the time, but it didn’t really mean anything. They’d tell us we’d have the best times ahead of us, our whole futures, until one day those best times, those futures, would become pasts, memories, photographs in dusty frames. That thought used to make me sad, but not anymore. You see, you don’t have to be so happy you could do somersaults all the time. Everyone gets sad sometimes and I think it’s good to acknowledge that, especially when you’re stuck in the newfound-college-break-boredom of our parents’ houses. We can take this time for break to recuperate, spend time with our home friends and family, but in the end, we’re still going back. And after that, we’ll be going someplace else. And that’s all a part of life. And we’re all so lucky to have these opportunities to become different people when we go different places, but to always remain ourselves.

So because I know how very special it is to have people who help me be all the different forms of me, I want to say a few things.

To the students still finishing up the semester, I wish you good luck and happy post-exam frolicking. I’m sure you’ll kill it.

To my professors this semester, thank you. It really and truly was an excellent term and that’s largely because of you.

To my school friends, whether I met you in Ann Arbor, Oxford, or Chamonix, thank you. That other humongous part of having an excellent term was all due to you. You make going to school fun and educational for wholly different reasons than the ones I attribute to my professors.

To my home friends, thank you. You always make coming home rewarding and strange, but fun all the same. I know I can always count on you to visit me in Ann Arbor when I really need you, or to at least send a hilarious gif to pick my spirits up.

To my family, you’re weird and fantastic and you should know that I love you for making me weird and fantastic, too.

To everyone else reading, maybe one day we’ll meet and you can help me become a different me, too. If not, you’ve helped someone else become different forms of themselves, and I know they are grateful to have known you.

Weekend Watch – “Straight Outta Compton”

It’s frustrating to see biopics fall into the same traps over and over, but “Straight Outta Compton” falls into many of them. It’s more enjoyable than many—funnier and more entertaining than the typical template of a genius white British man—and the subjects are more engaging and interesting than most biopic subjects. In general, it’s a good idea for a movie, and that idea makes it uncommonly interesting even when the movie lags.

And I think that’s the biggest problem: the movie lags a lot. It’s 147 minutes, but from the pace of the first half, it seems like it should only be 100, 120 at most. By the end, when ostensibly heartbreaking things are happening, I just wasn’t feeling sad because I’d generally lost interest in the movie at that point. I heard people behind me afterwards talking about how they were crying watching Eazy-E dying from AIDS, so maybe the movie had its intended effect on some people. But even though I thought Eazy-E was interesting, even though Jason Mitchell was one of the standouts of the cast, I just wasn’t invested anymore.

I think it’s also partly because Eazy-E getting AIDS feels like just another superfluous subplot in a movie full of them. There are countless cameos, like Keith Stanfield as Snoop Dogg and Marcc Rose as Tupac. Some of them are neat (I love Stanfield), and there’s always a little kind of thrill to seeing the origin of something great—like when Snoop Dogg and Dre sit down and make “Nuthin’ but a ‘G’ Thang.” Still, it’s pretty silly to pretend that that song was completely free-styled. More importantly, these cameos don’t add anything to the movie besides the slight novelty of seeing recognizable rap stars just starting out. There are so many things that the movie tries to deal with, from the death of Dre’s brother to the death of Eazy-E to the conflict with manager Jerry Heller (a great Paul Giamatti, though he’s so likable that his supposed betrayal didn’t even bother me), that it all just feels like too much, especially because it almost totally sidelines DJ Yella and MC Ren, two of the founding members of NWA.

So many biopics fall into this trap of being too cluttered and unfocused, and at this point, I’m honestly just left wondering why it’s so hard. “Selma” did it perfectly, focusing on a small slice of Martin Luther King Jr.’s life and building a compelling story out of it that never lagged. “The Imitation Game” mostly did it with the fun thriller-type plot of trying to break the code, and even though that movie isn’t great and falls into a lot of different biopic stereotypes, it made the right call when it came to having a strong central plot. But most of the other bland biopics that come out are just so long and so unfocused.

I think I have a theory for part of the reason why that happens so often: filmmakers feel like creating one central narrative is changing history too much, molding it into a simplistic linear plot format. This is the precise time that changing history for the sake of a movie is necessary, though. Sure, there are times when a movie does it way too much and is insulting to the actual events and people it’s trying to depict, like with “Saving Mr. Banks,” but generally, changing history to make a structurally strong movie is necessary.

So you’d think that the source of the problems with “Straight Outta Compton” is its strict dedication to history, but it’s also clear (even without me knowing much about the real-life subjects) that the facts have been manipulated. For much of the movie, Ice Cube, Dre, and Eazy-E are treated as kind of flawless rap legends, these civil rights heroes who don’t have many issues of their own besides the environment they grow up in. The individual characters’ histories with violence and misogyny aren’t really tackled; when characters do get in a physical fight, it’s either not the main characters’ faults (like when Eazy-E gets the shit beaten out of him by Suge Knight) or they’re doing it to protect the people close to them. The first half, while being a lot more engaging than the second half, still suffers from crafting a too-perfect rise to fame arc, with lots of scenes of crowds just worshipping NWA.

Still, there’s a lot to like in the movie, especially in that first half. The actors are pretty well-chosen; though O’Shea Jackson, Jr. is probably the weakest of the three leads, he’s such a spitting image of his father (the real Ice Cube) that it doesn’t matter. Besides, he’s strong whenever he gets to be angry, like when he destroys Bryan’s office, one of the few scenes that acknowledges the real-life subjects’ violent acts. Corey Hawkins is also pretty great as Dre, conveying a young person’s vulnerability and passion when he’s just starting out and commanding authority once he’s established himself as a star. I have some reservations about his reductive characterization as the ‘nice, good-humored guy’ of the movie early on, especially knowing about Dr. Dre’s assaults, but he still makes for a likable and interesting protagonist.

Most of the standout sequences of the film are in that first half. There’s the emotional scene when Dre learns that his brother was killed, and his friends comfort him. There’s the single long take of NWA partying in a hotel room that’s perfectly shot by director F. Gary Gray, recalling a “Boogie Nights” or “Goodfellas”-style scene of excess and offering an unexpected reference to “Friday” with “Bye, Felicia.” And, it should be said, the movie works well for its musical elements, because these are some pretty great songs. It’s just fun to watch “Gangsta Gangsta,” “Boyz-n-the-Hood,” “Dopeman,” and “No Vaseline” being performed and recorded.

By far the most effective and impactful scenes of the movie, though, are the ones that detail police brutality. Sure, maybe it’s not exactly nuanced—every single cop we see is unabashedly racist—but there’s something visceral and real about seeing all the black characters being shoved to the ground and handcuffed simply for existing. When NWA is told by the police not to perform “Fuck tha Police” at their Detroit concert and they do it anyway, it’s a genuinely thrilling moment. That whole scene is intense as the cops chase NWA down and arrest them, and the five of them all laughing together in the back of a police truck is a pretty perfect image. I can’t tell you whether NWA deserves to be put among the champions of racial equality, but it was pretty inspiring to watch in the film.

In fact, “Straight Outta Compton” probably would’ve been a lot stronger if it stuck to that: the production of the “Straight Outta Compton” album and the controversy NWA faced for their groundbreaking violent themes. There are isolated sequences of the film that are absolutely gripping, and there are a lot of good ideas here. The problem is that it’s all crammed into one overlong package. By the end, all it inspires is indifference.

Last Lecture

The Last Lecture is a book and lecture by Randy Pausch, a professor at Carnegie Mellon who has since passed away from cancer. It was founded on a tradition of professors being able to give on last lecture at the university on a topic of their choosing.

Randy wrote and spoke about how to accomplish your childhood dreams but it was also meant as a lasting legacy and lesson for his children.

For me this is my last post. I am graduating in December with a degree in communications and moving to Chicago for a new adventure. As I sit struggling through my last finals week there is a certain amount of satisfaction and enjoyment I have of this final finals week. I believe and have always believed I was meant to go to a large university and I was right, higher education isn’t for everyone, but it was for me. I look at all the things I’ve done but still question my expertise. I wonder if the work I’ve done in classes was really enough for a degree, to be universally acknowledged as having an amount of expertise in a subject matter.

That is that what I’ve learned here. Upon graduation or during school there are always things to learn and if you only learned the subject matter that is printed on your degree, your education is not whole. Being at the university has shown me what makes a friend for life and what a friend is that just passes through and to hold onto the people that will help you in life, not just for a day. There are people that are not worth keeping in your life and that’s okay. Everyone isn’t for everyone and energy should be focused on positive relationships not negative ones.

I have also learned you don’t have time you make time for the things you want in your life. If you want to be part of a club, have a social life or spend time on something outside of studying you have to make time for it. With the amount of work and readings classes handout you could spend time on little else. The University of Michigan has taught me so much about balance and prioritizing, because something will always try to take away time and we must make time for the things we love.

Lastly, I’ve learned failure is natural and it is how people cope with it that can define them. Coming here people told me it will be a hard adjustment to become “average,” because everyone is going to be smart and accomplished. The adjustment to being around other smart people was not difficult in the least. It was refreshing in all honesty. What was hard to adjust to wasn’t comparing myself to other people but comparing myself to the standards set by the university and the level you had to achieve at to get an okay grade. I failed classes, and many of my friends did poorly in classes that they needed to do well in. What people need to learn is to be okay with failure, to learn that it does not define everything but is a genuinely upsetting set back, but not something to be wallowed in. Roll around and be sad about it that’s fine but also learn to get up and figure out how to do better next time. Learning to be flexible and adjust to the wind so that a small problem stays small and don’t spiral has been one of my greatest lessons here. We all fall down sometimes and need to learn how to pick ourselves back up again but the staying down is what we need to fend off.

There is just so much to learn, and I hope your time at the university has been as magical and challenging as mine. Thanks for reading, Maria out.

Stretching Yourselves Whole Again

We all know the phrase, “I’m stretching myself too thin.” As college students, it’s sometimes hard to comprehend all that we’re actually doing and accomplishing in a day while fully wrapped up in papers, studying, parties, clubs, interviews, applications, volunteering, office hours, and hey, um, don’t forget sleeping, eating, and breathing! Rinse. Repeat.

Yogi Tea Quote via pinterest.com

And I say, it’s about time that we “stretch ourselves whole” again.

Image via traveltherapytours.com

 

 

 

So let’s chat about physical fitness for a minute. Ever since I came to college and am no longer a part of team sports like I was in high school, I’ve become very phase-y. First, there was the running phase. That wore out. Next was the strength training YouTube videos. That quickly ran its course as well. I’ll always have dancing and walking in my pocket because to me, I never feel like I consciously have to be aware that I’m “working out.” We are all different beings, though. So whatever your exercise plan is, you do you.

But one thing we should have in common is stretching. Stretching is in a category of its own. It’s like tea in physical form. It can warm your muscles and your central system, while relaxing you to a calm. The heat from the mug can sometimes be painful to touch, but the more you adapt to its fire, you find it comforting and embrace it. It’s good any time, morning, noon, night, when you’re sick, when you’re sad, when you’re cold, when you’re stressed, when you’re chill, when you’re in pain, when you’re bored, when you’re among friends.

Image via mojosavings.com

Okay, enough of the tea metaphor, you get my point. I’m not even talking about hot vinyasa yoga, I’m talking basic gym class stretches. Taking a moment to rub out the kinks of the day, to drink in the quiet, to listen to how your body feels and connect mind to body. We force our body to work so hard through the day. Stretching is your way of giving back to it. It’s the best non-vocal way of saying, “Thanks” (which is probably better – because can the body actually hear itself talking to itself? Philosophers, physiologists? What’s your stance on this?)

Now, you’re probably thinking, “What does stretching have to do with art?” Stretching is a practice of stimulating both mind and body at the same time, just like painting, writing, acting, dance – only at a slower pace. The carpet or mat you stretch on is an open canvas where you can let your mind wander, explore your imagination and discover yourself. It’s active, just like all types of art. There’s no correct way of doing a stretch. You listen to your own limits, follow your own desires. It’s recommended to open the window, breathe in the fresh air, scratch the carpet, draw with your fingers as if you were carving imaginary loops into the ground below you, hum to yourself, transport yourself to a far-off sandy beach in your mind while traveling deep into your heart. The more senses you can engage while stretching, the better. Stretching is your time to be positive, to be graceful. Allow yourself to be surprised. In the time that you could watch a V-Sauce video, you could also generate waves of positivity and possibility within your body.

Trust me, even through this hippy-dippiness, begin and end your day with a quick stretch. You know how satisfied you feel after you sneeze or yawn? Stretching is like a slow-motion form of your body yawning. You will love how you feel and you will find that joy steeped throughout your day [okay, tea jokes are now done!]

Best wishes for this final exams week, everyone!

P.S. Here are some of my favorite stretching videos on the InterWeb (if you know any others, please share them in the Comments below!!!)

Pushing Daisies S01 E03: The Fun in Funeral

This is the episode where we really start to see the show growing into its world and becoming better than the first two episodes promised.

Summary:

We once again flashback to Ned’s childhood to when he first starts experimenting with his powers at his boarding school. Through experimenting with fireflies, Ned learns what I will now be calling the minute, that once he has brought something back to life, he has minute before he must touch them again, otherwise something else will die. After this, he vows to never bring something back for more than a minute (that is until Chuck, of course).

When we come back to the present, we find Ned and Chuck baking pies. The two discuss Chuck’s new-found freedom to become someone new, which leads to Chuck’s questioning why he can only bring someone back for a minute. Ned skillfully avoids this question. This leads to probably one of the most remembered scenes of series when Chuck spontaneously kisses Ned through cling wrap.

Unfortunately, Olive sees this and is distressed. She goes to help a customer, Alfredo, and he comes to find her as a kindred spirit when she admits that it feels like all the oxygen has left the room. Through their conversation, we learn that Alfredo is a travelling alternative pharmaceutical salesman, which will come into play later.

Immediately after, Emerson enter and has a quick conversation with Olive about their mutual dislike of the sudden appearance of Chuck. We’re then moved forward to an explanation of the mystery of the week, though Emerson is much more reluctant than usual with the new intrusion of Chuck into their business. Emerson refuses to tell Ned about the case until he sees the body for himself.

The three then meet up at the morgue and Ned uncovers the body to find that it is the grave robbing funeral director that died in Chuck’s place. Ned runs away without touching the body. Finally, the truth comes out and Ned explains to Chuck that someone had to die in her place in order for her to still be alive. This obviously distresses Chuck.

Afterwards, we move back to the diner and another interaction between Alfredo and Olive. Alfredo shows that he clearly has a connection with Olive as he adeptly understands Olive’s inner feelings without discussion. This mood is broken, though, after he offer her some of his homeopathic medicine.

Emerson and Ned enter the kitchen of the Pie Hole and Emerson explains that he accepted the case to protect Ned from other private investigators and to find the stolen loot that the funeral director, Lawrence, had stolen. The crew then head to the funeral home because Chuck insists that Ned brings Lawrence back so that they can talk with him.

This brings us to a non sequitur where we learn what happened to Chuck’s aunts after the events of the first episode. Getting ready to start a new tour of their synchronized swimming routine, they go to leave their house. Here, they find a belated postcard from their previously dead niece and fall into a bout of depression.

At the funeral home, we learn of Lawrence’s twin brother Lewis and how Lawrence was caught grave robbing. Incredibly angry at Lawrence, the families of the deceased confronted the brother, leading to Lewis believing that he was murdered. Of course, Lewis insists that Lawrence never confessed to where he had hidden the treasures. After Lewis’s departure, Ned  touches Lawrence and apologizes while Emerson asks where the treasure is. Lawrence tells him that grave robbing was a family business and that Lewis had actually hidden the treasures.

After a fight with a casket to touch Lawrence the second time, Chuck breaks down, now distraught that she had learned that her aunts had fallen into depression again (learning this from Lewis before he left). Even though Ned sympathizes with Chuck, he insists that they cannot visit them. The trio then head back to the Pie Hole to go through the pile of hate mail for the funeral director brothers.

While sorting through the hate mail, Alfredo notices Chuck’s somber mood and offers a free sample of his wares. She agrees, but decides to bake them into pies that she could send to her aunts instead. Unfortunately, the aunts’ house is outside the delivery route, so Olive decides to deliver it herself.

That same morning, Chuck explains to Ned that she understands the emotional turmoil that Ned has been going through with this case and attempts to make amends. This is cut short as Ned finds the dead body of Lewis in his freezer.

After this, we jump to Olive’s story as she delivers the special pie to Chuck’s aunts. She is invited inside and learns that they are the famous Darling Mermaid Darlings. This leads to Olive’s discovery that Chuck is the thought to be dead lonely tourist Charlotte Charles. This shocks her, but doesn’t tell the aunts of Chuck’s new life.

We jump back to Ned and Chuck as they try to move the body before the cops come to investigate. This leads to Ned waking the dead and finding out that he died choking while being confronted about a missing Civil War heirloom. Because of her meticulous reading of the threatening mail, Chuck knows exactly who it was. The trio head back to the funeral home to return the body and learn more.

At the funeral home, Ned comes to find the confronter, William Woodruff. This leads to a sword fight between the two. During the fight, we learn that he was trying to frame Ned for Lewis’s death because he was afraid that he would face the blame. Surprisingly, Ned wins the swordfight and accidentally uncovers the hidden treasure that was behind a curtain in the basement.

During the epilogue, we find that Alfredo had left a romantic gesture for Olive, William was arrested, and Ned and Chuck return the stolen items.

Pros:

-There was a lot of great development for the characters in this episode.

-Anna Friel’s performances during her sad scenes were amazing. She can really sell the characters emotions.

-The cling wrap scene was very cute and well executed.

-Further development between the relationship between Olive and Emerson was much needed.

-The introduction of Alfredo leads to the hope of a more rounded character for Olive.

-Continuing of backstories for minor characters is great.

Cons:

-The mystery is again disappointing compared to later episodes.

-The audience couldn’t play along with the mystery like other episodes.

Overall:

This is a great episode for being so early in the series. The continuing introduction of Chuck’s conflicting emotions with Ned and her new life was beautifully handled and felt incredibly genuine. The reintroduction of the aunts was great and allowed for better plotlines for Olive outside of her puppy love for Ned. Alfredo’s introduction was strange but also helped to further Olive’s character. My only real problem was the disconnected nature of the narrative of this episode. There were a lot of jumps between the various, unconnected stories going on, making it tiring to retain attention. But this was only really a problem, because of the multiple times I have watched this episode.

Rating:

8/10 Daisies

Audio Effects Processor

There is a certain point during each and every semester when I essentially disappear. Normally, rehearsals are the culprit –
my involvement in way too many shows catches up with me and eats up weeknights and weekends leaving me little to no time for myself, friends or family. However, this semester I have been hiding on the 4th floor of the EECS building for different, yet still very musical, reasons.

This semester I am taking EECS 452 as my engineering Major Design Experience (MDE). As an upper level EECS course there is a certain amount of work which is expected and required, but in addition to that normal coursework 452 ends with a 6-week group project culminating in you and your group creating a working prototype of some product that uses DSP.

Early in the semester we formed teams of 4-5 students. My team consisted of three Computer Engineering/Science majors and two Electrical Engineering majors. In addition to their engineering backgrounds, each member of the team comes from a musical background bringing the experience of sound engineering, choral, orchestral and electronic music to the team. This resulted in an easy decision about the topic of project – we were going to create an Audio Effects Processor.

Modern music would not exist without audio effects processors as it has made the application of thousands of musical effects to an input signal as simple as the flick of a switch. Audio effect processors allow both novice and advanced users the ability to apply effects to their input audio without purchasing numerous expensive analog devices.

The processor which we created is an inexpensive, high quality audio effects processor. The processor takes in line, microphone or instrument level audio signal as an input, feeds the input through a pre-amplification circuit as needed, processes the signal using DSP techniques, and outputs a line level signal to be sent either to recording equipment, speakers, or additional signal processing units.

While this project has been tiring at times (Wednesday night/Thursday morning we were in the lab until 5 am making sure that our processor was working for Thursday’s Design Expo), it has been an exciting experience to create music via wires, circuitry and software rather than with a lot of breath support.