Simon Fashion Sheet

I’ve decided that Simon might be the type to have no ‘main’ outfit, but rather a lot of different ones. I envisioned him as fashionable and a bit vain, so it fits him. Trying to find a main outfit for Simon was hard; I had so many concepts for him.

As you can see, his fashion sense is very 1970s – lots of high-waisted stuff. He also has lots of sportswear, crop tops, blue, and other cool tones. He also has a more elaborate side going on than what’s shown here. His shoes on the far right were supposed to have red heels to symbolize blood, but I changed them to copper for better color cohesion.

Coping III

Some are invited with feelings embedded 

Seething listless while lusting for the same

We tangle ourselves to help us quell

The fleshless emptiness of our bodies

Stirring endlessly in vain to find something 

Something that will mask the pain

I wonder how many mantras I’ll chant

Before my brain is heeled and you’re gone 

Evolving Emotions: Anticipation

Looking ahead to the summer and Fall 2023 semester is intimidating but exciting! Don’t forget to live in the moment, learn all you can, and try to have fun in the process!

The best is yet to come. -Frank Sinatra
Pleasure is found first in anticipation, later in memory. -Gustave Flaubert
Vorfreude (n.) the joyful, intense anticipation that comes from imagining future pleasures. -Matilda Tornquist

Mixed on Campus #7 – Gabriela Barrett

Name: Gabriela Barrett
Mix: Peruvian & White-American (Jewish)
Major & Year: RC Creative Writing & Drama; Senior

I am a proud Latina Jew who is thankful for both sides of my heritage: the immigrants from Lima, Perú and the immigrants from Eastern Europe (Romania and Germany). I grew up in a household that was not only biracial and bilingual, but came from two families that practiced two different religions. My siblings and I were raised in a Reform Jewish Congregation like my father, but my mother was raised Catholic. We understood and practiced our faith while respecting my mother’s at the same time. The constant exposure to different cultures, religions, practices, traditions, and beliefs have helped create my identity.

Q: What do you wish more people knew about the mixed experience?

A: Being mixed is something no one really prepares you for. If you are mixed, it is usually because your parents come from two different races or ethnicities, meaning they also do not fully understand our experiences. The imposter syndrome is very much a real thing. While I have improved in dismissing this notion, it can be damaging when people do not believe you are who you say you are. It invalidates you. Not an action you might take or belief, your whole identity and being. Whether that be because of your skin color, the language you speak, the music you listen to, or the traditions that have been instilled in your life. I used to introduce myself as half- Peruvian. Well it is the truth. But, as I matured, I realized that my mother tried her best to still incorporate our Peruvian culture and heritage in the suburbs on the East Coast, far away from our Latino family on the West Coast. She did this with music, food, film, and of course, making sure we call up our family members and practicing our Spanish. I was lucky enough to also fly out there multiple times to celebrate holidays. I am a Latina. Yes, there is other blood flowing through my veins that is Ashkenazi Jew, but my experiences and history do not cancel one another. I now say I am Latina (not half). Growing up, I was a mixed Latina raised in a white-jewish community. I am privileged to have been accepted in both communities but there are silent judges who still always make you feel out of place. You sometimes just do not fit in, no matter how hard you try. “My skin is too white or my accent is too weak.” If the Spanish speakers in my family were not as forgiving with my shaky grammar, communicating would be even more difficult. But they love me, despite our different religions, despite our distance, and despite the color of my skin. We understand our bond and our strengthened by the two different sides of the stories we get to tell.

Q: What are you most anxious about right now?

A: People keep asking me what my plans are for post-graduation which I assume is the most obvious thing to ask to a graduating senior. I understand that. I even do that to my friends in a similar situation. But, as someone whose passion is in the arts and humanities, the future is not as easy to plan out. While a common answer, I am most anxious about my future. This safe bubble of education has cushioned me in my years of adolescence. But now, I do not get that security anymore. It is not just my career that I am unsure about. I’ve heard that the 20s is a time to explore, despite the stigma of knowing what you want to do straight out of college. I welcome the mystery of not knowing what I am going to do yet, but still fear the uncertainty. How will I support myself? Should I still pursue my dream or turn to something more safe? This leads to the other side of my anxiety, a side that is sometimes not talked about. The social environment of 20-somethings, post-college, is something that I am trying to mentally prepare for. Finding new friends, new hobbies, new love. They can be difficult to find, even more so in a new setting. You are met with this new life but without the training wheels that were given to you in the past. I am trying to tell myself I’ll be okay but also trying to be realistic. The people I know who have gone through all of this seem to have turned out okay, so maybe I will too?

The Kingdom of Tokavsk, Session 21: A Hastily Scrawled Entry from Tomon’s Servant

Editors’ Note:  This entry was written by the same servant of Tomon who wrote the to-do list.  The handwriting is sprawling and very distinctive, and we find it hard to believe it could be replicated.

Tomon’s meetings were canceled today, and now I don’t know what to do with myself.  Tomon doesn’t, either.  I’m writing this while he isn’t looking, but even if he does see me I don’t think he’ll do anything.  He’s relaxing in his chambers and not doing much at all, going through papers, I think.  Anyway, he has expressed interest in taking a walk around the grounds.  I hope we can go this afternoon because my legs are shaking so badly from nervous energy.  I’ve heard rumors that something happened, that somebody was killed.  Some high-up of the king here.  We are forbidden from discussing it while working, which makes me feel even worse because I feel I have to talk about it or something in me will burst.  So I’m writing it here.  I heard this morning that somebody was murdered on the grounds, and now everybody is wondering who did it.  I think it was somebody who was an opponent of the guy or a person who wanted his job.  Maybe a hire since people that high don’t always do those types of things themselves.  Not that the upper classes are weak, of course.  Just that they can pay someone else to do those kinds of things for them, I would pay someone to carry out a murder if I had someone to murder and the money to pay.  I would never commit murder, but if for some reason I felt the need, I’d probably do it myself.

My favorite theory is that an opponent did it because I think that sounds the most interesting.  Maybe he disagreed with a guy on something, so that guy decided he needed to go.  Of course I can only imagine what that kind of disagreement would be.  I don’t really know much about how kings work, so it could be anything, really.  Maybe somebody wants a coup.  But if they wanted to take over, wouldn’t they have gone for the king first?  Unless it was a practice kill, which doesn’t make sense if you think about it.  That just makes you more likely to get caught.