“BOOK. FISH. SUIT. TIME. MOTHER. FATHER. LIFE.
Everything is part of Everything.
We Live, We Blunder
LOVE UNITES US.”
~Maira Kalman
This quote is one I have recently come across on the back of a most intriguing book found in the basement of Literati Bookstore. The book at first looks like it was handpainted and handwritten, and that’s just how it is meant to be. The book entitled “My Favorite Things” documents and explores the significance of objects that thread in and out of our lives and make our lives what they are. It’s the most unmaterialistic book about material items.
It’s beautiful, it’s personal, it’s unique to Maira Kalman and yet it’s a book that speaks to every reader. Even though your eyes may scan over a watercolor illustration of Kalman’s living room and think, “That doesn’t look like my living room,” it nevertheless possesses armchairs, coffee tables, paintings, a window that looks out onto the street, perhaps a musical instrument, a stack of magazines, that reminds you of your own house – the advice given to you in that room, the stories told, the love shared, the tea spilled, the tears dried, the memories molded [some still enshrined in your brain while others you have forgotten].
This book about objects is extremely important in my life of late because of a certain transition: that passing of old houses from one family to the next. Two years ago, we moved out of my childhood house in Jackson, Michigan and my family followed me to Ann Arbor (staying on their side, of course, so as not to encroach on my campus lifestyle!) We passed over the keys to new residents, yet for financial reasons, we still had a bit of ownership over it. Through those two years, I never went back to see it. 1) I never had a reason to but also 2) I wasn’t sure how my heart would feel seeing it again.
Because a house is not just a box of wood and paint. It houses human hearts – it’s a body for our bodies. It lives and breathes with us. It changes. It needs mending. It provides nourishment and shelter and escape and refuge and yes, even stress. It is a home for our memories – from its smell to its stains to its cozy nooks of comfort. And when it’s no longer yours, it’s like a piece of your family’s identity is left behind, too. But we move on. We grow together, we make new memories, we find new nooks. But we still remember our old friend. And I bet you – it remembers us.
In honor of last week’s final selling of the Jackson house (we are no longer the bank), I’m dusting off a poem I wrote in the aftermath of our move:
ode to a beloved yellow house
I had a little treasure box
nineteen years and counting
a shy pastel bursting
with buttery flavor.
Nature had its way
with decorating – as it does:
promiscuous kisses watermarked
its walls, flecks of snow and dust
collected on its faded, well-worn cheeks.
The lilac lasted but a week –
a single blink of an observant eye.
Winds would break its fragile walls,
crack its bones
against the test of time,
they said.
But my treasure trove was sturdy,
a bulwark never failing.
Its heart beat
stronger
than any thunderclap.
When opened
(very carefully now,
locks to the right,
defies expectations)
I found a jungle of memories,
vines of lives
well-traveled
and
well-
loved.
Couch seats [seams ripping,
fur-bedraggled, evaporated tints]
welcome you
to Home.
A musty odor
of damp
and old
and wisdom
brings the anticipation
of summer.
Fans flap
and clap
and applause
your busy day,
try their best
to cool you
down.
That spot there,
where
you spilled your toothpaste,
brush too big
for your five year old
mouth,
looks up without disdain.
“Don’t give up,”
it encouraged,
and provided
second
chances again
and
again.
My box loved its pairs:
(Vivaldi, pancakes)
(parents, child)
(kitten, family)
(sickness, health)
(laughter, tears)
(darkness, creaks in the night)
A two-way
love
permeated through its walls,
from our skin-
we kept its secrets,
as it kept ours.
Look! My whispers,
my thoughts,
my jam-covered crumbs
nestle snuggly
in the space
between
carpet
and wood.
I close my box with one tear-
sealing our bond
with the one everlasting gift.
The love of memories
wedged deep in
hearts,
in cube-shaped
cutouts.
Jump right in
and don’t ever let go.
For we don’t empty,
we retain,
build on
new layers.
Today,
I have moved my treasures
to the transparent future
where I
can look out
and always see
my
lovely
little
box
-as it always stood-
filling up with new
treasures that
aren’t mine
to find
anymore.
