9/21

I will not write a race poem

So I’ll liken the trees to brown sleeves

With leaves tracing a pattern reaching 

Toward hearts

I will not write a love poem 

So I’ll imagine backpacks 

pushing back against lower backs 

Aching for a release 

I will not write a disorder poem

So I’ll write about food 

Itching to be eaten 

To enter a full stomach 

I’ll write about the mind 

Cautiously telling a cautionary tale

About candy and obesity and health 

While also singing songs and admonitions about body positivity Fighting and unlearning the things taught by tv screens I’ll write about life and regret and wonder why Why we just have to keep trying and keep fighting and 

Think of that as fun. In writing to the mind I’ll again and again call attention to how it’s all about your mindset and yet somehow I can never quite get my mind to set. I’ll remember that hunger means you need to drink more water and hunger means you want something so you need to keep going but hunger is never satisfied. In race, I’ll remember that every day is a race against time against each other against my own That there is this pressure to be the first the first the first when white people just get to live

I’ll… 

I…

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